Being a women

I had to wait until the world finished celebrating 'women's' day so that this post wouldn't be read on the lines of the usual cliché. Women like men have more or less the same set of reason to live. What differs is the method 'She' has to adopt to live that life. After marriage, not many changes in the life a man - same house, same job, same friends and same life. After a baby - a man's life tends to change a little bit with the additional responsibility. Every day remains more less the same for a man.

This post does not intend to generalize, it is an effort to pick on the social and cultural norms that define a woman's life. 

Once a girl reaches puberty the rules of the society changes drastically because the world outside is viewed as a horrendous place to live in. Girls are asked to be on guard - always. Her curfew limits are limited, her dressing style is scrutinized, she is asked to eat as much as she wants to weigh, she has to sit 'like a girl' and live 'like a girl'. Boys (may) also have the similar set of rules and I would like to not discuss about it much here because by itself it is a different topic.

Once a women gets married, her immediate family changes, her job changes (depending on where her husband works at times) and her responsibility changes. Even if everything around her remains, nothing inside of her does. Waking up to doing things out of love, being taunted by the other women who finds it difficult to accept that 'her son' now has another women in his life, cooking to the taste of the new family, getting accustomed to a different lifestyle, answering questions about how and why she does things, the extended family thinks its fine to ask you even intimate questions because they believe its out of concern and its their effort to understand you, screaming inside to the bullshit and act as if everything is fine and finally, sometimes living a life she never imagined.

But here comes the twist, not every women faces this, but most of them do. Giving birth to a child is an extraordinary experience no doubt. But, what nobody tells a women is how much she'd feel and be different. She will no longer be herself. She will feel so different and disconnected with the new her. She will now be awake or rather conscious at a whole new level that you never knew existed. She will be awake even when you think she is asleep. She will hear her child every second and will feel like she is listening to her baby's voice even when the she is ummm... flushing the toilet. She will go ahead wash things over and over again because she wants it to be 'clean', she is actively thinking of her little baby's schedule and how she can fit in her life in it. Bathing and eating becomes a luxury nothing else is of priority. Don't get me wrong, she actually enjoys it, no doubt.

A woman becomes and is always 'vulnerable'. I leave it here with that. Everyday a women has to decide her life around constantly trying to keep herself safe. Trying to decide what she has to do so she does not put herself in danger or rather she ensures she does not become a prey. The feeling of having to watch your back always isn't empowering. A women has to remember that she is not a half of anything or anyone. She was created as a whole, just like a man.

Why do we have to celebrate a day, exclusively? Because it is a way to thank all the men around the world for ensuring a women's safety and well-being by being a real man. It is to remind women that the world is a great place to live in and every effort they make is appreciated and recognized by the 'real men' of the society. A man holding the door (no, I am not asking a man to hold the door, but when he does) for a women is as important as a man standing up for a women. This day is to remember all the men who make the effort and all the women who recognize and appreciate the effort.

Let me tell you something every women wants to tell every man in her life - thanks for respecting and loving the women in your life.

Happy gentleman's day!